Class Sculpting..

With all this talk of Class Sculpting and waitlists, I take my readers inside the hallowed chambers of admissions committee at the Whaoggvurd school of business.

On a big mahogany table lies a curious checkerboard hooked up to a state of the art CRAY super-compter. The scene is straight out of a science fiction movie. The checkerboard is divided into a matrix with 100000 rows and 100000 columns. Each cell in the matrix has a red lightbulb in it. The rows and columns have headings ranging such as "Raised Iguanas", "Trekked barefoot", "Nepal", "AIDS volunteer", and so on.

The famed Admissions director (tanned and irritated, having recently got back from a trip around the world - interviewing and giving presentations, having survived a bad case of food-poisioning in Indo-china and sunburnt in Greece), sits in front of the super-computer. With a sigh, he hits the "CLASS SCULPT" button. The CRAY computer now takes over. The hard drive is whizzing, the databases are being scanned, and relational expert systems are doing their magic. After 5 minutes, the lights on the checkerboard light up. Not all, but 80% of them.

"Damn, the class is still not scuplted" exclaims the Director.

To give a bit of a background: Each lightbulb signifies a particular asset of the Class of 2007 at Whaoggvurd. For example, a light bulb in Row 500 Column 300 signfies "Nursed Kangaroos in a - - Zimbabwean Zoo". Other categories include "Ivy league Undergrad - - transfer from Community college", "Hiked in Macchu Pichhu - - with one bottle of water", and so on.

The Director is desparate. It is late May for crying out loud. Finally, he closes his eyes and proclaims "Bring in the Waitlisters. Lets enter Joe Schmoe's resume again into the database, we forgot to enter the 3rd bullet point of his 4 indented work experience last time. Oh, and lets enter Venkarunaja Mnahasjkthyiu Muttapaswamysriniwasa into the system again, Lets not penalise him for his name... and what about the guy who has chained himself to the our school gates, lets give him a chance as well."

All set, he hits the button again. The system does it magic. The junior adcom members are watching with awe. Finally, it happens.

"All, we have the ONE.... the only... the class of 2007.."

all the lights on the chekerbaord.. all 100000*100000 of them are lit.